Month: March 2015

Visual Pixie

Your Walls Are Boring. Quick Fixes.

383 out of 705 people have boring walls, according to people.  3 out of 5 people have art that is too small, according to me.  9 out of 10 dentists…  Choosy moms choose bare walls over crap on their walls.  Let’s stop this madness. Memorize this last column.  These are standard frame sizes that you can buy at Michaels, Hobby Lobby, Ikea and online for “cheap”. Then buy anything you like that you can fit into these frame sizes.  It’s cheaper than buying something that needs to be custom framed.  Custom framed means anything that doesn’t fit into the above sizes.  Custom framing means hundreds of dollars.  You would not believe how much the glass alone costs for large pieces. I do not want you to buy teeny tiny little pictures that look lost on your wall.  Yes, you can make “groupings” that will fill a wall but they are not the easiest thing to pull off and can quickly add a feeling of visual clutter to the wrong room. A room that is busy …


Memories of a Yard

I don’t really look back. It’s a waste of my energy. I let the good stuff propel me forward and I do my best to let the bad go. And every so often a mixture of the both will come back to visit. I say hello, learn what I can, and brush myself off. And nostalgia, well, that’s the same thing. I mean it happened. It’s over. Glad we had fun. Glad it was good. But you can’t live in the past. Even though, every so often I get nostalgic. I miss my old house. It was home. But I’m also glad we are free of it. To say that the house was labor intensive and required bags of money to maintain is to say that this winter Boston just got some snow or Donald Trump’s hair is just a little weird—it’s an understatement. However, despite all the work and money, the backyard was my oasis.  When Spring is in the air I remember my love hate relationship I had with it.  Oh the yard …


The Month of Jen

  Dear Gentle Reader, I LOVE my birthday. Or I did. Up til a few years ago I celebrated my birthday for a full month. I was giddy over it like a flea at a dog show. And as I’ve evolved into my 40’s  higher numbers have not phased me a bit. What has phased me is incredible bad luck that has now been associated with my birthday month–causing me to want to shake it like a lousy rat. There’s more to this caper called March then I bargained for—and just like cheap bourbon I am going to put it on ice.  The month of March has been like a sewer and I’m going to lift the manhole cover.  The month of March has been like a sick cockroach in a greasy diner and I’m calling Big Al.  I don’t really know what that means but I like it. The facts. During the Month of March years past: -I woke up at 1:20 am on my birthday and proceeded to crawl inside toilet bowl expelling everything since …


Ralph Lauren Paint Colors

    To paint or not to paint, that is the question. Do you “own” it and paint the walls an inky denim blue a la Ralph Lauren… Or keep it neutral and light? Or go boldly…   Ralph Lauren donated to complete the transformation at Thomas Jefferson’s Monticello’s estate in Charlottesville, Virginia. The dining room was repainted in Monticello Yellow which was designed to replicate the original colors in Jefferson’s dining room. How about his new restaurant in NYC?  I could live in it.  Ralph Lauren’s Polo Bar.  Love the green with the gleaming wood and leather.   All images are courtesy of Ralph Lauren.  


21 Things That Make Me Happy

    I’m chuckling as I write this post. Not because that video was funny, but because of you gentle reader who is getting all riled up at his mere image. But hey, this is not that kind of blog and this is not that kind of post. This isn’t about politics. I happen to like him as a person–I spent 30 minutes with him one day having coffee and he was f-u-n-n-y. But this isn’t about that either. Nor is it about the Presidential motorcade that I drove in that was totally AWESOME. It’s about laughing. Take your To Do list and stick it in the freezer. Now get a scrap of paper and write down some things that make you happy. Don’t over think it. Here’s some of mine: Late night shows.  (Recorded) Sleep. Good coffee. Having time to do something creative. Watching a good movie with my husband with real popcorn (no microwave crap), a Pims cup (google it), and my dog (kids can be optional). Going to dinner and a movie …


My Dog Has Fleas

  March 11, 2015 Are you there God? It’s me, Margaret…I mean Jen. Really? Apparently, if you put flea medicine on a freshly bathed dog it doesn’t work. And, yes, you can get fleas when there is 4 feet of snow. And, apparently, my dog is severely allergic to fleas. Also, potions and magic elixirs do not work with fleas. All those websites that say “Use Lavender!”, “Drown them with Soap!”, “Vacuum!”, “Peppermint!”, “Apple Cider Vinegar!”, “Sing to the New Moon on a Month ending in Y while sprinkling something that can only be purchased from Someplace Obscure for Money-Money-Money!”   Yeah. No. So after a trip to the vet and $276.00 I now have steroids, antibiotics, and Flea Pill 1 and Flea Pill 2. I also have a long list of more things to vacuum, wash, bomb, spit on, and study.  Study because that is what I do now. I stare at things. I dare the fleas to show themselves. Which they do, just only ON my dog while sitting on freshly washed you name it. My extra …


What Color Are These?

Are these drapes Yellow and Gold? Or White and Green? Just kidding.  They are obviously White and Gold.     If you don’t get it just google “what color is the dress”…