June is always ridiculous.
I called the orthodontist to see if she could reschedule my 11 year old’s appointment or give me an extra 15 minutes because I wasn’t sure we could make it on time. She said you must be having one of those busy days-and then I interrupted and actually told her why and what was making me busy–
“You see I’m teaching about an artist at 2pm in this very son’s classroom and just before that I have to go see a lady about the 8 foot octopus that I am making for vacation bible school and I really shouldn’t move the appointment because there just isn’t any other day and can you hold on because I think the UPS guy is here with the knickers that I just ordered for the Colonial Days reenactment we are having at school Friday”.
She laughed, albeit somewhat nervously, but that was all the encouragement I needed because I then launched into–
“I have to melt paraffin. Have you ever melted paraffin? I mean I have to melt a lot of this stuff–by 9 am–for the 4th grade to make candles with. It doesn’t matter. That’s not til Friday. Anyway, I really need to go because my 8 year old has 100 paper origami fortune tellers due and the dog is sitting on some of them and we are running out of time and can’t afford to have to remake any.”
Sure, I had too much coffee before that conversation, and yeah, that poor woman didn’t need to know any of that but whatever.
I need to pop 15 bags of popcorn, find 5 frisbees in our garage–which won’t be easy because of the 12 foot replica of the interior of a submarine currently residing in it. It’s also a hot mess because of the Storm Trooper Training Camp that just took place in our house for 14 kids and 10 adults resulting in a concussion for my 8 year old. This explains why all the tables are piled with board games because that is the ONLY thing he can do.
It would be great if I could get the house put back together and actually assemble a To Do list but what is the point? And as for the house, my husband and youngest have a camping trip this weekend which means recreate the campsite in our family room to make sure they have everything and pile the remainder on top of the board games, next to the in-the-works origami fortune tellers, beside the storm trooper flags, lightly dusted with ammo from 14+ nerf guns. By the by, did you know you can go through 200 nerf gun ammo darts in a matter of minutes? Yeah, you can which is why my husband got multiple boxes.
If anyone has thoughts as to how to…
Make an Octopus head with spray foam.
Get rid of pantry moths.
Entertain 140 kids for 6 Swim Team Pep Rallies.
Remove mysterious substance from my living room chair.
…let me know.
Now I need to call the orthodontist back because I never changed the appointment.